Guns N’ Roses – CHINESE DEMOCRAFUCKINCY!

Wow. I’m shocked to actually be holding this in my hand. I was pretty sure this day would never come. Chinese Democracy has finally been released, roughly 14 years late. Was it worth the wait? Well, it’s hard to imagine anything is worth waiting 14 years for. Unless it involves Scarlet Johannsen. But upon first listen, Chinese Democracy is pretty damn good. Music has been missing this kind of bombastic wall of sound, so thick with guitars and shrieking vocals you’d think you were back in ’87. By the way, Axl Rose’s voice shows up fully intact. He’s still crushing those high notes, though I’d like his vocals to be a little more front and center. Sometimes they disappear behind three guitars and a symphony. It’s an amazing feat that these songs have seen the light of day, and even more amazing that they’re actually rocking my face off. I believe someone owes me a Dr. Pepper.

THE VERDICT: Love me some GNR. And you should too.

Hancock

The cover really seems to be playing down the whole “alcoholic superhero” angle, as do the TV spots they’ve been playing for the DVD release. Too bad. The cover also boasts that this is the “1 Disc Unrated Edition,” which has to be the first time a DVD was bragging about being only one disc. This shows up in my mailbox today courtesy of Netflix. I’ll give my verdict later.

THE VERDICT: JURY’S OUT

Fred Claus

I’m a sucker for Christmas movies. But not this one. Oh god not this one. Ludacris plays an elf through the magic of CG. That’s all you need to know to understand the level of quality we’re dealing with here. This movie is miserable.

THE VERDICT: Despite the presence of Frank Stallone, stay far, far away.

Freaks And Geeks

If you haven’t seen this series yet, here’s a brand new reason to discover it. I have no idea what’s different about this version and the older release, but it does give me an excuse to tell you this is required viewing for everyone who enjoys anything. Oh, how I envy those who get to discover Bill dressed up as Bionic Woman.

THE VERDICT: Get your Freak on!

This entry was posted on Tuesday, November 25th, 2008 at 1:15 am and is filed under Film, Tuesday Toys!. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.