I am notorious in my hatred for Fox’s Mad TV, the sketch show without an ounce of subtlety in its unfunny bones (doesn’t have a funny bone either). I have never, once, ever laughed at the show during the times I’ve had the misfortune of leaving Comedy Central on for too long. But now, just as we’re given word that Ridley Scott is planning on sullying his career forever, the pop culture gods have brought a little balance to the Force by canceling Mad TV and its loud, broad, cartoony brand of sketch. That doesn’t erase the fact that the show has inexplicably been on the air for 14 seasons or that re-runs will still air on Comedy Central through the end of this year, but soon, my friends, we will be Mad TV free.
The Clone Wars cartoon starts this Friday at 9 pm on Cartoon Network. Watch it! If you love Star Wars, you’ll be home on a Friday night anyway. They had a preview on Cartoon Network this weekend, and the series looks phenomenal. Yes, this comes from an unapologetic Star Wars fanboy. But watching this preview, it’s hard to believe this will be on television every week. We have new Star Wars adventures every week on television! And it comes equipped with an Ackbar-style (Mon Calamari) Jedi!
Lucasfilm is the master of trailer-making, getting people’s hopes up beyond believable expectations, and then delivering an impressive product that people are nevertheless disappointed with, but look at that trailer! How can you’re a Star Wars fan?? — Whoops, deleted a few words there, or perhaps some Yoda-speak slipped in. How can you not be excited if you’re a Star Wars fan?? Thanks for pointing that out, Bloomfielb.
Remember that reference I made about Gervais starring in THE Office and Steve Carrell starring in The Office on Sticky Floor Friday? Seems they decided to battle it out at the Emmy’s last night….in a tickle fight.
Boom. Here it is! I’ve watched this several times and the one thing that stands out to me is that it’s going to look beautiful on the big screen. Earlier footage looked a little stiff, but this trailer has made me a believer. I’m still holding out to see how this whole, “rescue Jabba’s kid” storyline pans out. I have no idea why Jedi would be involved with kidnapping negotiations between a gangster and some renegades, except that it’s probably part of a bigger conspiracy. Also, if you’re wondering why Mace Windu sounds exactly like Samuel L. Jackson, it’s because it IS him. Kick ass!
Wow, we’re here already. The halfway point of Season 12. You know what means — Last South Park until October. Good God! Think of all the things that will happen between now and then (Indy, Iron Man, ALL of summer, the start of football, my untimely demise at the hands of an obsessed fan, the creation of an obsessed fan in my own mind, who I try to drive from my brain with self-performed brain surgery)! Wow, that’s a lot. Anyway, let’s get to it.
This week’s South Park doesn’t really have any dangerous keywords to bring weirdos to the site. In fact, there wasn’t too much edge to this episode at all. Sure, many people get brutally murdered, but really, the main point we’re supposed to take away is that historical re-enactment employees suck, and the pioneer times were tough.
The episode begins at the Pioneer Village, where the kids are taking a field trip. The employees all speak in an old timey accent and don’t break character. FOR ANYTHING. The goal of the Pioneer Village is to give the kids a living history of Colorado. But if anyone has actually been to these types of things, you know how awkward and embarrassing they can be. Mr. Garrison forces the kids to choose partners and hold hands until they get back on the bus. Not surprisingly, Cartman has trouble finding a partner. He even resorts to asking Kyle, who states, “I hate you, remember?” I got a laugh out of Cartman’s response — “Jesus, what have I ever done to you?” How quickly one forgets about purposefully transmitting AIDS when they need to find a partner. Luckily for me (though not for Cartman), the only other person without a partner is Butters. Butters is determined to hold Cartman’s hand until they are back on that bus. Pairing these two together provides the biggest laughs of this episode.
The kids tour the town, meeting the blacksmith and the gunsmith and so on. Cartman notices a “Super Phun Thyme” amusement center across the street and literally drags Butters along. While Stan is questioning the townsfolk’s devotion to their craft, police sirens are heard in the background. All of a sudden, a car busts through the gates and several men with guns get out. Stan and Kyle start looking for a phone, but the townsfolk are not being very cooperative. They won’t break character, even after one of their own is shot in the head. Did Trey Parker have a bad re-enactment experience as a child?
Meanwhile, over at Super Phun Thyme, we’re treated to an amusing montage of Cartman having an awesome time while Butters holds his hand. Cartman is singing the song playing under the montage, and it’s funny to see Butters get hit by bumper cars as he runs alongside Cartman’s car. I wanted to enjoy this more, but it felt like familiar territory. Like when Cartman had control of his own amusement park. After Butters pleads for Cartman to go back to the village, he reluctantly leaves Super Phun Thyme only to run into the cops. They think they’ve been busted for ditching. Butters has a breakdown, starts crying, and gives Cartman the weakest punch in the history of the universe. This is the beginning of several kick-ass moments between these two.
In Pioneer Village, we learn that the men with guns are actually robbers who just got away from a big heist at…Burger King. They made out with like, a handful of cash and 4 sacks of burgers. This leads to a great moment when the tech guy asks for his cut, and Franz, the leader (who looks suspiciously like Hans Gruber for no reason other than to remind us Hand Gruber is awesome) hands over some money and a hamburger. The tech guy riffles through the burger like it was cash. Great visual gag.
When Cartman and Butters see an opening to sneak inside, they climb up a traffic light but slip and fall. They’re saved only by their interlocked hands, and when they cut to the wide shot, we’re treated to yet another great visual gag of them hanging above the street. Now that I think of it, there were a lot of great visual gags in this episode.
The rest of the episode deals with the terrorists trying to get the code to some secret escape route, but the townsfolk refuse to break character. There’s not much to note here. The best part is when the work day ends and all the townsfolk break character, answering all the real-life questions the kids had during the crisis. Also, Franz gets the wrap-up speech about how Pioneer Village has a lot to teach us. It’s all very absurd, and kind of funny because it’s so pointless. But I felt that way about this whole episode. It was kinda funny. God bless Butters.
And that’s it for several long months. I was kinda harsh on a few episodes this season, but don’t mistake that for random internet hate crimes. I love South Park and would take their worst episode any day over pretty much any other show on television today.
South Park: Super Fun Time Review: 2 Whoppers out of 5
South Park Season 12 Mid-Point Review: 3 Arbitrary Stars Out of 5
My “South Park” reviews usually generate a ton of hits from web site searches, but sometimes the traffic coming in isn’t quite my target audience. Take, for instance, last night’s recap of SP. I made the mistake of mentioning the minor detail of Randy’s ‘Japanese girls puking on each other’ fetish. As of noon today, I’ve had 70 visitors pop by looking for different variations of “Japanese puke porn.” So, for anyone looking for Japanese Puke porn, you won’t find it here. Sorry! I’m no stranger to luring weirdos to my sites for my own amusement, but I also know people looking for fucked up shit aren’t going to stop and read a South Park review when they need to get their rocks off to a couple of hermaphrodites having sex with lawn furniture.
And yes, I realize that by further mentioning Japanese girls puking, it will only bring more oddball traffic to the site. What can I say? I have a stat fetish.
By the way, the title of this post is a reference to the episode, not an admission of any problems this author may have. I swear! This week’s South Park was a perfect example of a great idea being funnier than the overall execution. The episode, titled “Over Logging”, brought to light South Park’s obsession with the internet, Mr. Garrison’s subtle assertion of masculinity, and Randy’s love of Brazilian fart porn. It centers on the idea that we are now completely dependent on the internet for all information, and would be lost without it.
At the Marsh household, Stan, Randy, and Shelly are all wasting time on the net, while Sharon tells them all it’s time for bed. It was nice to see Shelly return. I can’t remember if she’s been featured in an episode since she dated Skylar back in Season 3. Before anyone can finish what they’re doing (especially Randy, who’s intent on watching some porn before bed) the internet goes down, leaving the family confused. They go to Kyle’s house to use their internet, but they’re having the same problem. Turns out all of South Park’s internet is down, and they’ve gathered in the street to talk about it. Mr. Garrison’s in the crowd, and this elicits a laugh from me because he’s dressed in a robe and holding a pipe — just what a man who used to be a woman who is now a man again would wear to feel more masculine.
8 days later, the family is still without internet access. Randy is sick, but can’t figure out what’s wrong because he can’t go on Web MD. When they finally can’t take it anymore, the Marsh family packs up and heads out West, the “Californee Way.” I laughed at “Californee” the first few times, but it wore itself out after a little while. At this point, the episode switches to black and white. There’s a whole section where they stop and sing a song with other folks looking for the internet, and say Californee a bunch of times. I think it’s a reference to “Grapes of Wrath” but I really just found myself hoping for a big payoff. And it did come. Literally.
When Randy and the family make it to Silicon Valley, the internet is being rationed out at a campsite in 40 second increments. Randy pulls aside a Red Cross worker and tells him he hasn’t jacked off in two weeks and really needs to, but can’t do it out in the open. When he’s pushed aside, Randy clenches his balls in agony. Some sketchy guys notice and lure him into the internet porn simulator, which is a brilliant idea. Basically, it’s a cardboard box that looks like a computer. You sit down and tell it what you want, then someone draws a picture and holds it up. There’s just something funny about Randy driving all the way to California to look at a fake internet when he could have easily just picked up a Playboy at home. Regardless, he just can’t get aroused by the poorly drawn versions of Japanese girls puking on each other, and the struggle continues.
At the same time, the government is trying to communicate with the internet, which is just a router located in a bunker somewhere. There’s a funny Close Encounters of the Third Kind reference, but other than that, this part of the episode lacks punch. The climax (yep) comes (uh huh) when Randy breaks into the room they store the internet at night and downloads all the sick porn he can possibly think of. Japanese girls puking on each other, elephant bestiality, but surprisingly, no 2 girls, 1 cup. Randy starts making ridiculously loud noises that wake up the entire camp. They think he’s being attacked by an animal, so they bust in and find him completely covered in his own spunk. (When was the last time you heard spunk, by the way?) I mean, it’s ridiculous. All over the walls, the computer, Randy’s entire body. He starts making up excuses about ghosts coming in and sliming him, and it’s easily the best moment of the episode.
Somehow Kyle figures out how to fix the internet, so he goes down to the bunker, unplugs the router, then plugs it back in. Problem solved. It’s funny because it’s true! Well, it’s true anyway. Like I said, this storyline was kind of bland. The episode ends with Randy dressed in a weird Indian outfit giving a speech about responsible internet use. It took some research to find out what they were referencing (On Deadly Ground?) and I’m not sure how it was relevant to this episode. Overall, taking a shot at our internet dependency is funny, and seeing Randy Marsh covered in ejaculate is damn funny, but it took a while to get to the big joke at the end, and funny in concept doesn’t always translate to funny in execution. Now get off the internet and live your lives!
South Park “Over Logging” Review: 2 Japanese Puking Girls Out of 5
There’s been a lot of talk this past week about the “pregnant man.” It reached its peak with his/her time/soul-sucking hour on Oprah, in which Oprah squirmed through awkward questions like, “Let’s talk about what’s going on with the genitalia.” Of course, “pregnant man” quickly loses its luster once you find out the “man” is actually a woman who had her breasts removed and was pumped with hormones. Alas, we will not be getting a sequel to Junior.
Leave it to “South Park” to jump all over the story. This week’s episode, titled “Eek! A Penis” employs a formula that Trey Parker is not a big fan of: Multiple, separate storylines. Lucky for us, they’re both strong, absurd, and hilarious.
Using the “pregnant man” as its jumping point, the episode begins with Mrs. Garrison freaking out in class, realizing his sex change was a mistake. Unfortunately, Garrison went all the way with his sex change, as graphically detailed in “Mr. Garrison’s Fancy New Vagina.” He’s removed from class and replaced with a student for the day. Naturally, power-hungry Cartman does his best to get Principal Victoria’s attention and wins the job.
Meanwhile, Mrs. Garrison finds out the local laboratory is doing genetic testing on mice. They’ve already grown an ear on a mouse, so Garrison sees a window of opportunity. He heads to the lab and offers all the money he has for them to grow him a penis. Hm. Seems logical enough. At school, Cartman has turned the class around, helping them score the highest grades ever. The Denver County School Board enlists him to teach inner city kids, and you just know there’s a movie parody coming. Personally, I was hoping for Lean On Me but instead we got Stand and Deliver.
Cartman transforms himself into the Edward James Olmos character, shaving his head, creating a comb over, and insisting they call him Mr. Cartmenez. All the cliches of inner city school movies are held to the fire, from the pregnant, hopeless teen to the reluctant, defiant student. But with Cartmenez as the teacher, the roles are reversed. Cartmenez teaches the students all about the value of cheating, citing Bill Belicheck, a man who cheated in front of the world and wasn’t punished for it. He prove his point by cracking a student with a baton during a basketball game and convincing the pregnant teen to get an abortion because it’s the “ultimate form of cheating,” repeatedly pondering out loud, “How can I reeeeach theeese keeeeds?”
Five paragraphs in and I haven’t even mentioned the Penis Mouse. Forgive me! While Cartmenez is doing his thing, Garrison is busy checking up on his penis, which is growing on a mouse. Everything’s going well until when he opens the box to test out the little critter and it escapes from the lab. This sets off a wild penis chase with the mouse running all over town scaring all the women. Not only is the image of a tiny mouse with a floppy penis on its back a ridiculously great “What the f*ck!” moment, it gives Garrison a chance to toss out classic lines like, “Boys, have you seen my penis? If you see it, just try to catch it with some cheese.” I promise you’ll never see or hear those things anywhere other than “South Park.”
And just when you think you’ve seen it all, in the middle of the chase, the mouse and the penis have a Fievel-esque ballad under the moon. Why? Why not! The episode wraps up with the return of MR. Garrison, and Cartmenez receiving a plaque for teaching the inner city kids “The White People Method.” There’s some message about women being defined by whether they can have kids, but it’s not really important. And for this episode, that’s a good thing. It didn’t get bogged down in messages and didn’t force the issue like “Canada on Strike.” They just told two really funny stories, one of which had to do with a running joke about a running penis.
South Park Eek A Penis Review: 10 arbitrary penis-phobic women out of 12
Well, you knew someone had to do it. Ever since the writer’s strike ended, I’ve been waiting for shows to return so we could get the requisite strike jokes out of the way. Naturally, “South Park,” a show that wasn’t even on strike, got to it first (”South Park” doesn’t fall under WGA regulations). After last week’s return to form, I feel like “South Park” stumbled a bit with this episode. While there were some really funny moments and it was nice to see someone show a different perspective of the strike, it was ultimately unfocused.
The episode, titled “Canada On Strike,” thinly veils Canadians as the Writers Guild, going on strike because the world neglects Canada Appreciation Day. I say thinly veiled because they refer to themselves as “The WGA — The World Canadian Bureau.” They want recognition for their hard work, and some of that internet money everyone talks about. So they stage a big musical number, as Canadians on South Park are prone to do, and strike against the world.
When the kids realize they won’t get new Terrance and Phillip episodes (and Cartman realizes they may have to watch “Family Guy”) Kyle gets on the phone with the head of the WGA (That’s the World Canadian Bureau) and tells him they’ll make money for Canada on the internet. The boys make a viral video of Butters singing “What? What? In Da Butt” and it becomes an internet sensation. The episode picked up for me here, because I can’t resist Butters in costume.
Once it’s a hit, the boys go to collect their theoretical money and find themselves in a waiting room with all the other internet sensations looking to claim cash for their videos. Everyone’s there, including the Numa Numa Guy, The Tron Guy, the Laughing Baby, the Star Wars Kid, the Leave Britney Alone Guy (or is it Girl?), The Chocolate Rain Guy, Afro Ninja, Sneezing Panda, and, my nephew’s favorite, the Dramatic Prairie Dog. At first it looked like a Meet The Spartans type spoof, where they just referenced each internet sensation. Then the agenda became clear: Trey Parker hates internet sensations. They start fighting over who has more YouTube hits and end up violently murdering each other. I was laughing my ass off when the Numa Numa guy was fighting Tron, but I could have done without Chris Crocker.
The kids get their check for 10 million “theoretical” dollars, and bring it to the head of the WGA. After realizing it will do nothing to help them, the WGA leader breaks down, and it’s up to the kids to negotiate with world leaders to end the strike. They end up giving out coupons to Bennigans and a bag of bubble gum, equating the (real) WGA’s new deal to an insignificant gesture. The episode ends by repeating an earlier bit between Terrance, Phillip, and the WGA leader that was very similar to Adam Sandler’s old sketch Buddy.
Unfortunately, whenever “South Park” centers an episode on Canada, it fails to deliver the goods. There were a few good spots, like the musical sequence and the news broadcast of the Danish coming to America to take Canadian jobs, proclaiming Denmark as the “Canada of Europe.” But that’s where it ended. Canadian jokes were already mined in the South Park movie. Here, they’re used as a front for the Writers Guild and it was a stretch to have Canada asking for internet revenue. Trey gets his shots in at the WGA, pointing out that the strike cost them more than their new deal compensates, and that it’s nearly impossible to quantify internet earnings and share in theoretical profits. I just wish there was a funnier way to do it.
South Park Canada On Strike Review: 20 Arbitrary Stars Out of 60
