You can read my original review on Tropic ThunderHERE if you’re so inclined. This is a must-see for one reason: Robert Downey Jr. He takes what could have been an offensive, riot-inducing character and turns it into a high-wire act, balancing audacity and hilarity in a movie-saving performance. There are a lot of problems in Tropic Thunder, but there are also a ton of laughs, and laughter can cover up a lot of issues. Word of warning: Make sure you turn the movie off as SOON as the credits begin to roll. Gratuitous Tom Cruise dancing will erase any good memories gathered in the previous 100 minutes.
THE VERDICT: Rent it!
Wall E
Haven’t seen Wall E yet, but I’ve heard nothing but good things. It’s Pixar, we all know they can do no wrong.
THE VERDICT: Rent It!
David Lynch: The Lime Green Set
Any fan of David Lynch will be shocked to hear this is a 10 disc set that only includes 4 movies. Lynch has been notorious for not doing any commentaries or special features for his movies (until the recent Twin Peaks box set release). Hell, he even released Mulholland Drive without chapters, which drove me and my friend nuts when we spent an entire day trying to figure the movie out. Just try skipping around in a movie using only fast forward. It’s as maddening as Mulholland Drive itself! Anyway, this 10 disc set features a whole lots of Lynch extras, including animated web shows, his short films, deleted scenes (32 from Wild At Heart), and, the coolest of all…a MYSTERY DISC! Of course David Lynch has a mystery disc! From what I read, it’s got the deleted scenes on it, but also just a lot of weird, atmospheric stuff. I’m guessing it’s similar to the three hour mind-melter Inland Empire, but with less story. If that’s possible.
THE VERDICT: Buy It If You’re a Lynch Lover. Everyone Else Should Probably Just Forget It Exists. It’ll Hurt Your Brain.
Logan’s War: Bound By Honor
I just felt like the site was seriously lacking some Chuck Norris.
THE VERDICT: There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
I’ll admit, I’m no Trekkie. I used to watch the The Next Generation, I like Wrath of Khan just like everyone else, and I really enjoyed First Contact. Beyond that, I don’t get too fired up about the endless iterations of TV shows and decreasingly entertaining films. So it’s no surprise that when I saw the new trailer for JJ Abrams’ Star Trek, I was underwhelmed. I’m sure the movie will be entertaining, and kick this franchise back into gear, but I have no emotional attachment to the images I was seeing. There’s a young Kirk. There’s a young Spock looking exactly like Leonard Nimoy. There’s Simon Pegg with some wacky hair. But it feels like a standard Sci Fi movie, not a cornerstone of the Sci Fi genre. And why does young Kirk drive a car into a canyon, then say his full name to a robot? That’s the first image that’s supposed to pull us in?
Revelation #2: Go Rent Kung Fu Panda!
Wow, what a surprise. I was expecting Kung Fu Panda to be entertaining, but I didn’t realize how kick ass this movie actually would be. It doesn’t pander to kids, tells a good story that unfolds in fun, unexpected ways, and has a real heart to it. On top of that, the voice acting is pretty solid, even though the the Furious Five are underused (who knew a combo of Seth Rogen, Jackie Chan, David Cross, Angelina Jolie, and Lucy Liu could be so unasumming?). That’s okay though. This is Jack Black’s movie all the way, and he manages to make Po both sympathetic and hilarious. If you’re a fan of JB, you’ll love the way he makes the character his own. And how he says Spladoosh.
Revelation #3: Leatherheads is Every Bit as Exciting as the Trailers Suggest. (Translation: It’s Not.)
A screwball movie about the beginning of professional football doesn’t even seem like a thrilling idea on paper. And maybe if this movie was made 50 years ago, it would be considered a classic of sorts, but it wasn’t. It was made this year. I understand what George Clooney was going for, making a period piece that feels like it came straight from the era, with verbal sparring between Renee Zellweger and bar fights where the piano player keeps on playing. Unfortunately, it’s just not engaging. The big climax is supposed to happen during the big final matchup between Clooney and Jim from “The Office.” Supposed to happen. What happens? The announcers declare the game is “boring.” BORING! You know there’s a problem when even the people inside the movie are sick of its shenanigans.
I am notorious in my hatred for Fox’s Mad TV, the sketch show without an ounce of subtlety in its unfunny bones (doesn’t have a funny bone either). I have never, once, ever laughed at the show during the times I’ve had the misfortune of leaving Comedy Central on for too long. But now, just as we’re given word that Ridley Scott is planning on sullying his career forever, the pop culture gods have brought a little balance to the Force by canceling Mad TV and its loud, broad, cartoony brand of sketch. That doesn’t erase the fact that the show has inexplicably been on the air for 14 seasons or that re-runs will still air on Comedy Central through the end of this year, but soon, my friends, we will be Mad TV free.
And you thought Jaden Smith remaking Karate Kid was bad? Ridley Scott, director of Alien, Blade Runner, and Black Hawk Down, is producing (and possible directing) a big screen version of Monopoly. Seriously. Apparently, it will have a “futuristic twist” in the vein of Blade Runner. So instead of Deckard chasing down replicants, he’s going to be collecting Marvin Gardens?
Now that Ridley Scott has paved the way, think of all the exciting projects elite directors can attach themselves to without fear of joining an artistically bankrupt project!
I’ve been putting off talking about this all morning. But now it’s totally official. Will Smith’s son Jaden is starring in a remake of The Karate Kid. Let me repeat that. The Karate Kid is being remade with Jaden Smith in the role of Daniel Larusso. Macchio was 23 when he made the original. Jaden is…10. Mr. Miyagi immortalized Pat Morita and was even nominated for an Oscar. He’s irreplaceable. Billy Zabka was one of the best villains of the ’80s as Johnny “Sweep the Leg” Lawrence. Maybe he can reprise his role and become truly evil by putting a beat down on a 10-year-old.
I get it. It’s called The Karate Kid. This time, he’s actually a kid! Apparently this new movie is going to “borrow elements” from the original, but alter things to suit little Jaden. If that’s the case, they pretty much have to change the entire movie. The themes of the original Karate Kid are not age-appropriate for a 10-year-old. What about the Elizabeth Shue storyline, where Daniel feels inadequate because her family is well off? Is Jaden going to have a play date with a rich, child beauty pageant contestant? How about all the lessons Miyagi teaches? All of a sudden, waxing the floor and painting the fence turn into child labor! And what about the scene where Miyagi gives Daniel a car for his birthday? Is he going to give Jaden a Power Wheels Jeep?
When I talked about Hellboy II on Sticky Floor Friday, I urged everyone to see it the weekend it came out, because it was going to get trounced and forgotten the following week. Well, that was an understatement. 7 days later a little movie called The Dark Knight was released and laid waste to Hellboy’s meager $34 million #1 opening. It’s a shame, because Hellboy is a truly imaginative film and one of the best of 2008. Everyone was overshadowed by Bruce Wayne this summer, but now is the time to repent. Pick up Hellboy II and I guarantee you won’t regret it. Once you see the Tooth Fairies, you’ll be hooked.
THE VERDICT: Buy The Big, Red Bastard!
Star Wars: Clone Wars
I was ultimately outnumbered in my support of Clone Wars, but I stand by my review that it’s a great introduction to an amazing television show. Now that it’s on the air, the Clone Wars cartoon is proving there are still viable stories to tell in the Star Wars universe. And since the movie was originally part of the TV series, it’ll stand up much better on the small screen. I’ve read blogs where people think Lucas released it in theaters to “trick” unknowing moviegoers into buying a product intended for television. If that were the case, they would have heavily promoted the movie and crammed it down our throats. Instead, it was released with minimal expectations and advertising, and proved to be an entertaining piece of fluff.
You know, people hold Genndy Tartakovsky’s “Clone Wars” cartoon in high regard, but if the second season was released in theaters, people would have griped about how it was a money grab. I saw a special screening of that entire season in a theater, and walked away with the same feeling as the newest Clone Wars movie — fun as a TV show and cool to see on the big screen, but lacking scope. If people would have been asked to pay money to see the original “Clone Wars” series, I bet the perception would be a lot different today.
THE VERDICT: Wah, wah, wah George Lucas! Check it out if you’re not a bitter fanboy.
Hey there. How was your weekend? Mine was filled with revelations. See, the weekend is generally the time I watch the most movies and television, usually compiling a list in my head of notes and observations that would otherwise go unheard. Aren’t you lucky?
Revelation #1: You Don’t Mess With The Zohan is a funny 20-minute idea stretched out to 2 hours.
As with all Adam Sandler movies, story is irrelevant so long as it produces laughs. But man, I can’t quite get over the incredible bungle of Zohan‘s storyline, which featured Sandler as an elite soldier leaving Israel to cut hair in New York. I liked Zohan in the beginning. It was fun to see Sandler portray a ‘character’ instead of just playing a version of himself as he has in his last few movies (Reign Over Me being the exception). Zohan can catch a hacky sack in his butt cheeks, then battle terrorists by catching bullets with his teeth. He has a battle with his arch-nemesis, a terrorist played by John Turturro, where they play paddle ball with grenades. And that’s all in the first 15 minutes. It’s all really silly, but the locations and over-the-top nature feel fresh.
Then Zohan goes to New York, and we fall right into any cookie-cutter Sandler movie from the past 6 years. Look, there’s Rob Schneider! Look, it’s Nick Swarsdon! Hey, it’s an impossibly hot girl who has a contrived, requisite romance with Sandler! There are also a ton of jokes about Zohan’s crotch and how he uses it on old ladies. It’s funny at first, but the filmmakers take a sledge hammer to your funny bone, pounding the same spot over and over again until it’s too painful to bear. By the time the end rolls around and John Turturro and Adam Sandler are inconceivably joining forces to battle a mustachioed Dave Matthews (which also makes Zohan an aider and abettor of terrorists), any sane moviewatcher would tap out from the torture.
Revelation #2: Road to Perdition is Overlooked Awesomeness
I know Road To Perdition is sometimes dismissed as Oscar bait by some, but Sam Mendes’ follow up film to American Beauty is pretty bad ass. I love seeing Tom Hanks as a hit man and a conflicted Paul Newman as his father figure forced to put a hit out on someone he loves. It’s a robust cast (Oh, is that Bond himself, Daniel Craig??), and a solid gangster movie. Not to mention, any movie that can turn Jude Law into a balding, pale dude with a death fetish and no chance of getting ladies has my support.
Revelation #3: Circuit City Goes Bankrupt, Nerd Gets His Revenge!
I’m a Kevin Smith fan, so it’s hard to be unbiased when writing a review of a Kevin Smith movie (Hell, I even liked Jersey Girl). Zack and Miri Make a Porno is his latest, and big shocker, I liked it quite a bit. Not sure if I can say I completely loved it, but it’s got a lot of rewatchability and it’s anchored by one of Seth Rogen’s best performances. It also proves that Kevin Smith still knows his way around four letter words. And while Smith has always been about “dick and fart jokes,” Zack and Miri is the first time he really, really turns them into visual gags. In fact, there’s one joke in the movie that will probably make you gag, but judging by the audience’s reaction, it’ll also have you laughing for about 2 minutes. It’s one of the best/worst gross-out gags put on film.
Zack and Miri is a story about two friends who have fallen on hard times. They can’t even pay their bills to keep their electricity and water on. When they return to their 10-year high school reunion, they have trouble facing the fact that 10 years have gone by and they’ve done nothing with their lives. At one point Miri asks Zack, “We’re better than those people, right?” and Zack flatly answers, “No,” adding, “Well, unless one of them is on crack.” It’s actually a refreshing exchange that shows some maturity in Kevin Smith’s writing. Normally his characters are holier-than-thou slackers who still feel the world is in front of them, so they can piss on those around them. Even in Clerks 2, Randall was still treating customers like dirt even though he hadn’t progressed beyond flipping burgers. Here we have people who realize they haven’t reached any potential, and probably won’t achieve those big dreams they may have once had. It’s something that strikes a chord with a lot of late 20-somethings, and it’s brought sharply into focus at the high school reunion.
Hit the dumb jump to read the whole review. (more…)
